Colorado Dumb Laws

No Snowballs in Aspen 

Nestled in Colorado’s Rocky Mountains, Aspen is a winter wonderland. But denizens of the city better resist the urge to form snow into a ball and hurl it in the direction of a person, building or vehicle. The municipal code that outlaws throwing snowballs also applies to stones and “other missiles.” As far as we can tell, violators face fines and possible jail time. Source 
 
Aspen isn’t the only municipality that is sans snowballs: Loveland, Glenwood Springs, Louisville, Keenesburg, Snowmass Village, Idaho Springs, Nederland and Leadville reportedly have similar ordinances. 

Spitting on the Sidewalk 

In our search through the Aspen municipal code for info related to snowballs, we came across a prohibition on “expectorating on sidewalks or in public buildings.” However, that ordinance was apparently repealed. We’re not sure, then, if it’s open season for sidewalk spitting or if the anti-expectoration rule was rolled into another ordinance during the course of municipal housekeeping. Source 

No Car Sales on Sunday 

Sunday is traditionally a day of rest. Whether or not Coloradoans adhere to that tradition is their business. But one bit of business that shall not be done on Sundays is “selling, bartering or exchanging … any motor vehicle, whether new, used or secondhand.” Violations are a misdemeanor punishable with fines of up to $1,000 and up to six months in jail. The ordinance, though, does not apply to the sale of boats or snowmobiles, or the trailer needed to haul them. Source 

Kissing Sleeping Women 

In Sterling, it’s a no-no to smooch a woman who’s under the influence of the sandman – at least according to a museum located about 300 miles south of the city. Unfortunately, we weren’t able to dig up any primary sources for the law, which is said to apply to all of Logan County. Nonetheless, let us be on the record in support of prohibitions on kissing sleeping persons.  

Taillights on Cats 

Here’s another one out of Sterling and the surrounding Logan County. Again, we were unable to locate primary sources, but it’s too fun to pass up. According to some online outlets, outdoor cats must be outfitted with taillights. 

No Indoor Furniture Outdoors 

Imagine: You’re driving around and see a sweet couch with a “free” sign on it. Before you scoop it up, however, be sure you have a spot for it inside your home – at least if you’re in Boulder, which prohibits the use of indoor furniture in outdoor locations. What a pity! That mustard-yellow, velvet sofa would have looked great on your porch. Source